I see you are a fan of goggins. reading his book was the reason I did the two marathons. More importantly seeing how he found happiness by cutting out the bullshit & fat from his life and blazing your own trail.
Ya many PMO have had these thoughts. the helplessness feeling can take you over if you let it. Talking about it honestly. finding healthy ways cope. I don't know your situation but if you would like to share some details might nice to talk about it.
Are we willing to sacrifice our avoidance of the reality that this body and personality is going to die?
Are we willing to sacrifice the assumption that we are the thoughts and feelings passing through our awareness of being?
Once for semi-nude images on YouTube. Apart from that, cravings almost non-existent (a blessed relief). Still, one day at a time. Pride comes before a fall!
you gotta be. social media is made to hold your attention and all my algorithms would always shift to recommend girl content. trigger central. plus I'm more connected to my actual friends than ever before now that I'm off it. I don't miss it
Fear and shame keep us in our habits. That's why it is important to talk about it honestly and not feel ashamed about our past.
I remember reading somewhere that in lab tests, men who became especially anxious or afraid were far more likely to find a particular woman sexually attractive. I also read that in warfare the primal terror of wounding and death is repeatedly activated, leading to frenetic lust that is typical of the wartime landscape. I’m willing to bet almost everyone struggling with sexual energy issues is filled with fear/anxiety, whether they admit it or not. And most of us have fear of facing the fears! Oh well….
I fell last week. Relapsed quite bad I did not follow the above list I created got back from a holiday and thought I could take it easy for a few day. Was not self aware enough at the time to know that would be a problem or maybe I just did not care as I was out of my routines but I have be proven right again when I stick to the above list like I did this week I had very productive and happy week. relapses happen and Iam not going to beat self up as it was perfectly avoidable and I know step moving forward to improve and have already implemented those.
thanks for posting and being accountable. Let that be a slip and not a full relapse - get back on the wagon ASAP! get an AP or attend SAA meetings - its helped me a lot. to OP - great topic. Ive said many times Id give anything - including my life - to stop this addiction. and of course later my addict brain said "dont be so dramatic" and I relapsed so many times since then. I think with addict brain it doesnt matter as much "what Id sacrifice." because I dont get to choose that. The addiction takes what it wants, and it doesnt give a shit about my opinions. It helps to know how seriously bad it is, and knowing Im willing to put my entire life on hold for recovery. but that has less to do with sacrifice and more of what i want to GAIN - my life back, finding joy and happiness in music, art, community - clarity of thought, achieving my goals again, healthy relationships, etc.
Thanks for the support bro and I have gotten back to my normal self this week. I do have an accountability partner and that is big part of my recovery. Just want to say that on here as reminder to myself that it is important to stick with my routines they keep me grounded and happy. Goal of this post was to show if you sacrifice all your bad habits you can replace them with good healthy happy habits. Not only will it make it easier to quit PMO but it will make you better person and that anyone can do it. "I think with addict brain it doesn't matter as much "what Id sacrifice." because I dont get to choose that. The addiction takes what it wants, and it doesn't give a shit about my opinions." I know the above is your opinion but I respectfully disagree. If you lay down to your addiction and think you have no control then it gives you the excuse to relapse at any point. You have no accountability cause you can blame it on that. I try to make sure my words hold weight as well. I have adopted mentality when I say I'm going to do something. I do it. Might not work out or I might fail but I don't run from it. I'm not perfect and this slip or relapse humbled me but I know my methods have worked for me because I went from relapsing almost daily to month's long streaks. There is always work to do. I think overall were on the same page we just want to be happy and be fulfilled and how we get there is our own path.
Hey, glad youre getting your life back on track. thats what matters most. I'm glad youre back in routines. The definitely help. But keep in mind, most people relapse when "tough / unexpected" situations come up in life, that affect routine. Abstinence requires building multiple "fail-safes" to falling back into addiction. An AP, healthier lifestyle, therapy, etc. but maybe you already know this. It is not my opinion. This is copied from Sex Addicts Anonymous / AA. You can read it here - it's the First Step in addiction recovery: https://saa-recovery.org/literature/first-step-to-recovery-a-guide-to-working-the-first-step/
