Who here has a good relationship with their parents?

My dad is my best friend. My mom, on the other hand, I prefer to avoid at all costs. Any time her number comes up on my phone, my anxiety shoots up. She's been gaslighting me my whole adult life.

My dad and I share the same feelings, and I believe she treats me the same way she treated my dad. She drove us into depression

 

My Father has probably killed a Woman together with another Man but then was released short after from the turkish jail, because the turkish government has decide to bring out general amnesty as a political solution.
Guilty or not they were all released.
And my Father came out from jail in the 70s or 80s in Turkey...and they have also released alot of other criminals.
My Father never talked about this...but we have heard about it from other Village People.
They have talked alot about him in his City.
My Father came from a small Village in Turkey, same like my Mother.
He was a bad Guy and I am not proud to say this but it is what it is I guess.
I am definetly not like him.
He has always used Violence towards our Family and my Mother.
He broke my Mothers chin and teeths. She was almost dead back in the 90s and bleeded from her nose and she survived.
My Father was an Asshole.
I don't know why but my Parents never decide to get divorced....maybe the reason was social pressure or to look like "hey we are a happy Family"
Unfortunately my Mother is not a better Person.
Thats the sad truth about it.
She suffered also from her Dad and her Family in general as well and also from my Dad.
Violence has always played a huge role in her Life.
Today she is an old Lady with headscarf and mentally ill.
They were/are strict conservative Muslims who were both forced to marry each other simply to get rid of my Parents.
And I am the 6th Child and last child of them.
My Father died in 2017.
He was an old Man.
...Sometimes I wish to be born in a much nicer Family.
Today Religion has no meaning for me at all.
I don't see how Religion has helped People to become better Human Beings.
This is nonesense.
My Brother has a toxic conservative view as well...sometimes talking with him is fun but I can't stand anyone from my Family tbh.
None of my Family Members loved me.
They haven't treated me like a Son or a Brother but more like a Stranger.
I simply hate them.

Now some would claim that I am the Continuation of my Dad and that I have to act like him.
I am definetly not like him.
I don't like Violence at all and I never support that in any kind of ways.
I am myself really shocked how some Men act brutally against any Woman.
Love is Peace and People are not anyone elses Property.

 

During my childhood and young adult life the relationship with my parents was very bad. Thankfully, I was able to reconcile with my father —about 8 years prior to his passing —and my mother. I would say getting older and learning about their histories definitely helped with the reconciliation process; my father was a Vietnam vet with bad ptsd and my mother was the victim of sexual abuse and other traumas. It made me step-back and ask myself “if I had that kind of baggage would I have raised a child any better?” The answer I came to was, no, I probably wouldn’t have so why hold it against them? Also to my mom’s credit she apologized for everything, which I know is a huge gift most children do not get from their parents.

I find God’s timing in the whole affaire to be perfect as I got to enjoy some years with my father before his death and now my mother, who’s disabled, is in need of a caretaker and I’m able to be one from a place of caring instead of being filled with resentment.

 

I am pretty close to my parents since moving back with them, I've opened up about my journey with them and they are very understanding.

Sometimes my mom can be weird and start going on tangents but honestly what girl doesn't, other than that it's usually smooth. They encourage me to put myself out there and I will always be grateful for that.

 

Jeez!!! That's insane. I've heard this is a serious problem in Turkey. I watched a documentary called Dying to Divorce which was about women in Turkey who were killed or had serious injuries from their husbands and the lawyers who are fighting for their right to get a divorce.

I don't blame you after going through all that.

 

I used to get on better with my Mum than my Dad but now it's the other way around. My Mum has had mental health issues and it has affected our relationship. When I was younger I didn't get on with my Dad. He would be stressed out a lot and complaining most of the time but since retiring he's calmed down a lot and is easier to talk to. For the most part, my parents are good people who've been supportive. I probably wouldn't have been able to go back to school if they weren't supportive.

 

I always got along better with dad than with mom
There was an epoch when I felt not loved by mom because she was irritable, easily angry. On the other hand, dad rarely got angry with me.
Also they had problems and argued often, it was so stressful!
Over time, I realized mom was depressed and I started to understand her more. (I also was depressed)
In her last years, I tried to improve our relationship, to have more confidence with her, to be closer, and I succeed. Then she died...
But it was wonderful when she told me I was the most beautiful thing of her life! I still cry when remember this!
Then I focused on the relationship with dad, make it closer, get to know him better.
Now I try to be a good daughter and he is a loving dad.
I have learned parents are not perfect, they are human beings like everyone and have their own wounds, traumas, sufferings, fears, which they often don't know how to manage. Simply, they have their own life story.