Hey all, I signed up a few days back. I've been PMO'ing almost daily / every alternate day for years. Really want to ease off, cause more than anything, the porn is having a mental effect on me, tainting the way I normally think of people, etc. Feel ashamed of giving into the urges, without even trying to exercise self control. AND, met this really special girl in college. Don't wanna take this dark side of me into that relationship. We're countries apart during summer break, and will be back together in a month or so. For the sake of this relationship, I really wanna focus on what's real, and not some instant virtual fantasy. So there's my goal. One month clean. No porn, nothing. It'll be hard cause I've got a lot of free time and high speed net. I'm looking out for a summer job, started working out a bit, extra academic learning, etc. to occupy as much time as possible - cause as long as I keep myself busy, my mind doesn't drift as much, I hope. Any advice would be welcome. And good luck to everyone else out there.
Hey, just do it! 30 days is easy. When you get the urge, just slap yourself in the face and do 10 push ups . But you know and said it already, fill your schedule. I think you'll be fine with that mindset. Me I signed up just now. I've been trying to quit for 2.5 years. I think I rebooted a few times already but performance anxiety ED made me relapse and/or edge again and again.. So I experienced all kinds of reboots. Is this your first try?
Gan.KI is right, it's easy but do realise there will be times when you get the urge and need to stop yourself. Don't rationalise. Good luck.
This is my first concrete effort. And yeah, all this is a lot easier said than done. Gets crazy after the first 24 hours. How about pre-emptive measures ? Stuff like installing filters etc., is it really all that effective ? In the moment, it's pretty easy to buckle and undo whatever measures that have been put up..
Hi imaginator93, i'm ajay here with a small message for you. Pardon me, I'm just 15. I hope you'll hear me. 30 days is damn too hard. And,you're trying this for the first time. Even I've taken great vows like that, but I can never keep up. But this is completely possible, if you have a very strong will. I think GAN.KI's method is right. You Can do it. Even if you fail, never quit. As you've got a LOT of free time, sign up to a camp like trekking or something like that. You won't have a chance of PMO-ing. Be sticking around with a lot of people. That would help you. Good luck
Hey ajay, thanks for the input. I agree, you've got a point. Been thinking along those lines, so I've enrolled in this industrial training program for the summer. They've got pretty long hours and a long commute to and fro, so almost as good as going on a trek Toughest thing so far has been preventing myself from wandering when surfing the net on PC / phone. Right now, I'm able to walk away, but in time, this false confidence kind of thing builds up, when I think, "Hey, maybe I'll just watch a little P, enjoy it, and shut it off." But most of the time it doesn't end like that. Need to nip the thought at the beginning itself..
Fell off the wagon. No porn, but didn't take the effort to hold off the urges. The fact that I close my eyes and bring up images of stuff I've watched earlier so unconsciously is worrying.. messed up state of mind Reset #1.
You can do it brother imaginator. Just stay strong and at all cost don't visualize anything you remember from a video that's going to cause you to become aroused. God Bless Godschild
Thanks for the support, Godschild. One day in. This addiction has made its way onto a subconscious level, giving me really weird dreams. One of the things that freaked me out in the first place..
Hi, again. You have dreams, just be happy. Your body is responding perfectly to your vow. So, worry not. I've heard from some where that the more the urge you have, the more positive things you can do with it. So try hard to transmute your thoughts and focus on a creative work. I heard that it's the method sages used centuries ago. Good luck.
Three days in and my concentration is shot to pieces. Can't focus on anything for extended periods without my brain wandering to something erotic. But, on the positive side, I'm finding a little more will power to say no and resist till the urges pass..
Looked at some P material, but didn't MO. Dunno if I should be resetting my counter. Only thing keeping me going now is not wanting to experience the disappointment of losing all the ground I've covered
Reached 4 days and then reset. Really need to deal with the issue of the false confidence that I can control myself when watching P. Looking to observe complete abstinence now - got web filters installed , tried to mmake the upcoming week as busy as possible, etc. Hope this works !
Reset #3, today morning. Woke up after some erotic dreams and couldn't control it. Setting that 30 day challenge in the beginning seems to have been a serious over-estimation of my self control. But I'm not going to let go just cause this journey has proved to be so much harder. Atleast I'm getting to identify my triggers and try taking action against them..
Past last time's failure point. Having full days with very less free time works wonders guys !! Hoping to go all the way till 10, and beyond..
Reset #4. That false confidence caught up with me again. Need to put away the phone before sleep, and think about installing blockers there too.
The toughest days are the second, third and fourth day. Need to put as much distance possible between me and those thoughts. Working on the assumption that I'll never be able to resist the slightest temptation, also makes a difference. Really hoping to build up a solid resistance
It's really been rough. Max I've been able to achieve is 7 days. All kinds of issues with false confidence, complacency, boredom, even a sense of entitlement. Relapsed within 2 days or less in the past week. I feel I'm not putting up enough of a fight when the urges arise, not thinking about what's there to gain, not thinking about how crappy I'll feel later just for a few seconds of pleasure. And that too, when it's so evident, the mood swings that happen immediately after a relapse - the anxiety, doubt, depression. All that previous strength of mind and sharpness vaporized. The internet filters and website blockers are in place, but I'm letting my mind wander and unconsciously search out other temptations. I need something to do when my mind starts to drift, at the beginning of every relapse. Especially at night when I've just got into bed / when just waking up. It's when I'm most vulnerable. Any suggestions ? What's working for y'all ? I need to control this..
