Good day, everyone, I'm Eaftos Echthros (Greek for Self Enemy, which I felt somewhat appropriate). I've been fighting a pornography and masturbation addiction on and off since I first became addicted at the age of 12. After about 10 years of fighting this pretty much on my own, I've decided to seek help from as many sources as I can get. While it's never gotten to a point where I feel like I've completely lost control, I need help, I'm not beating this completely alone. Lately, my motivation has been lackluster for many things in my life, and I blame my addictions for that fact. They drain so much of my energy and make it hard to participate in normal social activity. I'm also nearly 100% sure that these addictions caused me to develop what's called "Conversion Disorder", amplifying the natural anxiety and stresses caused by my overdriven amydala. Though there's not a ton I can do to reverse the process, ridding myself of these addictions will help stop it from getting worse. Hope I can find some help, and hope you have a good day, guys.
Good luck. You might like this guy's vids: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o4ujctdYJnQ It also helps to learn more about what's going on in your brain: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XvyejdlmKpE&feature=youtu.be Remember, it's not unusual for the anxiety to get worse for a few weeks when you first quit. Withdrawal raises anxiety: http://www.yourbrainonporn.com/what-does-withdrawal-from-porn-look-like Did you request an Accountability Partner? That can help. You're not alone in any case.
Besides cutting PMO (which in itself reduces your ability to stay clear in your mind and extroverted so you can connect with people), I'd really say that you should put high priority on getting better at connecting with people. To conquer your anxieties through that. If you don't get an outlet for your life energy and creativity, a lot of your life can be spent on the "holding my self back" thing only. Holding yourself back from using porn and masturbation as that outlet. Or to patch up that "need".
Thanks for the links! I really didn't know that it did cause such problems as ED. That's much more scary than what I thought. I'll have to talk with my therapist about what I can do to healthily blow off anxiety. Maybe there's something in Mark Queppet's videos, as he seems to talk a lot about multiple kinds of anxiety or energy and lack thereof. Thanks for the warning. I haven't requested one, but I might just do so. It seems like that would be a great way to keep oneself on the strait and narrow. Interestingly enough, my therapist keeps on challenging me to get out and interact with people more often. I think I've got more reason to do so, now. It'll probably be easy to use that resource to do so while my creativity is being caged up during school. I guess it's luck that I'm just starting into school right now. Thanks!
(Huh, thought I had replied to this already, guess I must've screwed something up.) Edit: I was right, I did reply. It just didn't show up until today for some reason. Thanks for the videos and suggestions guys. They actually really help more than you can know. It'll probably be hard, and the upcoming low-energy period and high-anxiety period is going to be especially hard, but I'm extremely hopeful that I'll be able to get through it.
