Ok, so I joined up and within a day I failed after 29 days on my own It felt good to get so far and I didn't want to admit my failure, but with some tough love I accepted it. Its the only way to improve... but today is a new day and this is where it really begins! there will be no PMO from now on! and No P on its own! the only time O will happen id with my wife. I don't need this shit in my life and I now understand how good it feels to overcome this thing as I did it for 29 straight days and that was without any outlet at all. This time my wife is open to having sex as Ive been open and honest and I have built her trust in me. I reckon this will be a bit easier. I hope to keep my journal going and improve my love life with my wife! I don't need this and as of now I'm viewing it as PMO is not an option just good wholesome love making! Please give any tips to help me on my journey because as of now you guys are my support crew and I wanna do the same in return... I can do this and after 29 days I felt good about myself imagine how it will feel after 60 or 90 or 365 or hopefully indefinitely. For the first time I don't feel weird or an outcast as I no longer feel alone in my struggle and can see there are others in my situation and they are succeeding!... We can do this! life is more important than a screen and isolation
29 days is a very good start. Your taken some solid steps in dealing with your addiction and improving your relationship with your wife. Journaling is a good idea and you will get tons of support here. I'm relatively new to NoFap and there are many on here that can give you much better advise. That said, based on what worked for me, you may find these tips helpful. Get educated - There are there standard three videos including a famous Ted talk called "Your Brain on Porn" which is highly recommended to a newbie. Again, these are mostly related to how porn effects the brain which you may not be so inclined towards given that it's not really a problem for you. If your interested, check out http://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/the-fourth-essential-video-for-nofap.35842/ . There is a wealth of information on this forum. Explore and you will find a lot to relate to. Start a NoFap journal - It is recommended practice to jot down a log of your journey and share whatever you want to. There is great power in knowing there are others who respect and appreciate your efforts and your struggles will help somebody in a similar predicament. I found it therapeutic to come back to my own previous entries when things got tough. Know why your doing this - I think this is very important. A realization is different from motivation. The first streak after I joined the forum was easy but staying consistent became a problem until I had deep spiritual realizations which resulted in better abstinence. I think NoFap requires a change in world-view rather than using raw will-power to enforce a change in habits. It's kind of like the 'inner game' of NoFap. There are no triggers visible when your focusing on the light. Understand your triggers - Is there something in particular that is causing you to start fantasizing? Is chatting with a particular girl making you horny? Whatever it is, observe what they are and avoid them. Try to catch the whispers before they overcome you. Do something - Your triggered. Now what? Don't just sit there waiting for your mind to get engulfed with the fantasy and get into the point of no return. Do something about it. Some suggest taking cold showers. Listen to music. Go outside. Exercise. Whatever works for you. There's also a famous relapse prevention tool that a generous member of the community has made. No edging - The only times you touch your penis is for peeing and maybe personal hygiene if your into that. Even morning wood is dangerous if your not careful. Beware of the chaser effect - It's just like when you quit smoking for a long time and have one just for old times sake. Next thing you know, you've finished an entire packet in one hour. It's the same with fapping. We are all humans and we will fall down sometime and if you do, get back up, brush yourself and know your extra vulnerable. For me even wet-dreams have led to relapse because the dopamine fix urge was reintroduced in my system. Focus - Shift focus to productive activities. If you don't see it, you won't go there. Porn blockers - You should install the K9 porn blocker if you think you won't be able to abstain initially. It will give you the valuable time to realize what your doing and stop before it's too late. Help others - It really helps your commitment to NoFap if you help others in a similar predicament. It's therapeutic. Get a counter - To get your counter, click on any other counter and you can setup yours including a predated one. You can modify your signature as you wish. Hoping this will be helpful for you. Wishing you success on your journey.
