I don't know what to do, i lost all my motivation to go out of this. Before, I used the argument that it took up too much of my time, but recently I have realized that even with this addiction I can still do the things I should. I don't have many problems with my job and recently I've even been learning piano, plus I've been playing video games to distract myself, but I realized that porn is no longer a big problem. I'm still addicted and of course I don't have control because I can't stop, but it doesn't interfere with the other things in my life. With this I lost the motivation to go out because before I thought "I have to do it or I will destroy my life" or "I have to prove to myself that I have control, so I can improve" but I realized that even with the addiction I continue to improve. I don't know what to do and I don't know where to get motivation anymore. I'm still addicted and I'm losing the desire to try to get out and I'm afraid of getting trapped.
I used to be just like this. I think its very common, another way P brain rationalizes the addiction. I even told myself, "it calms my nerves and helps me do better" - as if it was somehow an asset to my life. But the thing with PMO is...there is NEVER enough. It wants more from you, your tastes will continue to morph as "vanilla" content wont do it. Youll develop new fetishes over time, ones that will conflict with your morals eventually the progress and "doing good" will slow to a crawl. Then you will start having anxiety and panic attacks, and brain fog. BUT HEY KEEP GOING ITS NOT SO BAD YOU CAN STILL FUNCTION AND HIDE IT Then youll start developing ED. Before or after its left your love life in ruins. Losing motivation can happen sometimes. But dont let P brain convince you of literal BS to keep a sick and twisted addiction going. A "high functioning addict" is still an addict. Think of all the people that snort coke and convince themselves they "can get more done, stay alert and focused". Or athletes shooting up steroids. Then multiply that by DECADES until youre a shriveled up mess of a human.
