i find the shame of porn helps me with other goals

i have issue with porn because i have niche interest which is difficult to find what i like without it causing me a whole lot of grief because what i watch is pretty fucking gross and there is only very few i can watch that i dont get that instant negative reaction its one of those things thats just how it is. there will always be some degree of disgust just the nature of porn. especially when your pushing it with the shit you watch

its basically i like some things and disgusted by other things as porn is mostly a forced dynamic people are just looking to fap and porn is not always perfect either is life for that matter.

the issue is i basically choose between finding what im looking for or fap and be grossed the fuck out

one of those weird aspects within sexuality.

one positive aspect i have found with disgust is it produces an ability to stay focused

i have certain goals that i tend to become complacent with when i get beat down in the NoFap trenches

when i get bad reaction from porn i get new motivation and energybecause of the negative of porn

which i see everything has a silver lining

so sometimes porn is bad sometimes these negative reactions help promote postive reaction and change

some would say self sabotage but i think its more yin and yang or equal and opposite reaction