I'm from India. I started masturbation in my 9th grade ever since i hit the puberty(if that's the word they use for men as well). I felt so guilt at times after masturbating. In fact, i had a lot of questions on my mind like why am I doing a sin? why kind of pleasure is this? is it even good to do this? I couldn't find any proper answer for those questions. Althought I don't believe in religion (but I'm from a religious background), I'm surrounded by both people, who think masturbation is a sin and also who think it's good and a stress buster. I surfed a lot on the internet and tried to understand what is this in exact. Couldn't get a clear explanation as doctors themselves are not giving a clear answer to this question. Some are saying it's not good to ejaculate. Some says it's good to do it if you have it under control, like once or twice in a day or a week or a month. I don't know whom to believe. So i started to control myself from masturbating. I still remember, i was in my sophomore of my college. I almost controlled myself from ejaculation for 40 days and then when I had a group study with my friends, they manipulated me and scared me which eventually lead to ejaculation once again. Ever since then, I couldn't stop myself from doing it. It started like twice in a week, then once in a day and now became thrice in single day. I got so addicted to porn which made my life miserable. I couldn't concentrate on anything. I was broke. My self-confidence was gone. I couldn't even get a job anywhere. Later I remember the NoFap community which i came across while I controlled myself for 40 days that time. I immediately googled it and opened the website to read some forum threads. I got confidence that If people out there who are suffering just like me can control their urge and addiction, why can't I? That's when I decided to control myself by not watching porn and masturbate. These two things are the major disastrous habit that I have/had in my life. Today is the 11th day of my NoFap. I'm feeling good for now. But at times, I get these emotional strikings in my mind like I feel depressed sometimes for no reason or anxious about something which does not even exist. These 10 days were hell when I was struck by those feelings. For no reason, i went through all those. Maybe it was a side effect of not fapping. On the other hand, I also felt some confidence was boosting in me. I started to see this world from a different point of view. I'm glad that I chose this platform and an idea of stop doing masturbation. If you have read my introduction patiently and come up to this line, I really thank you for taking your time and reading it. Happy NoFap! ✌
Hey bud! Welcome to the community. You are in the right place! I encourage you to start a journal and regularly contribute to it. Also, get some accountability partners. Checking in everyday, or multiple times a day, is a great support. It also forces you to stay connected to this site...which ultimately keeps the addiction and recovery in the forefront of your brain. We cannot forget we are addicted. Taking action, each and everyday, is crucial if we want to get sober and stay stopped. Again, welcome to the community! Feel free to message me anytime. I look forward to reading more about your struggles and your successes during your journey. Wishing you the best!
Thank you very much for your support. I’m really looking forward to getting myself fixed via this website and you people.
Fixed might not be my go to term, but to each is own. Lol. Getting fixed would equate to actively working a recovery program and putting together some time with quality sobriety. I don't believe we are ever cured from this addiction. I believe we can put it at rest through hard work and dedication to sobriety on a daily basis. This is what I personally strive for each and every day. However, this addiction is certainly sneaky and will take over our thoughts and potential actions in a heart beat. That's why I remain vigilant and continue to incorporate the recovery tools I've acquired every day...even when life seems great and my addiction seems far away. It's these times, the unguarded times, where it creeps in. So for me, this is a daily surrender. Looking forward to chatting more and hearing all about your journey!
I now feel the same after experiencing a relapse. I understand that this can be a never-ending cycle. We can only ensure that we are not heading down the wrong path. Choosing a direction in which we want to go is the only thing we can do. The rest is not assured. Anything can happen while we are on this journey. I don’t want to chase a cure anymore as it never existed in the first place. I’ll go with the flow and try to protect myself from whatever comes my way.
Glad you're not beating yourself up too much about it...relapse happens, unfortunately, but we must brush ourselves off and keep marching forward. I just focus on today...I don't think about tomorrow or yesterday, I just focus on staying sober today. Sometimes it's even a moment by moment thing as I'm just trying to get through a vulnerable moment. Regardless, my sobriety is based on what I choose TODAY. Hang in there man and keep us updated. Wishing you the best!
I'll keep what you said in mind. I'll also start doing the same, trying to stay sober and focusing just on today. Thanks for the piece of advice and your support, man!
Of course bro! I'm always here to chat. This is a tough addiction that requires our full attention, each and every day. Also, many people leave this community when they think they're cured. I can't identify with that because everytime I think I'm doing great, I let down my guard and get lazy with my recovery program...then relapse. I'm not telling anyone how to work their recovery program, but for me, this is a lifelong thing, one day at a time. Keep me, and the community, updated on how things are. Wishing you the best!
I get what you're saying, and I'm right there with you. It feels like this recovery thing is a never-ending deal, and we have to keep at it forever to hit our goals. We end up slipping and making excuses a lot. The first two days are seriously tough, you know? After that, it's smooth sailing for a bit, like we're the boss of everything. But then, bam, we're back in the grip of the addiction. That's when we've got to dig deep and see how badly we want to stick with this NoFap challenge. So, here I am, resetting from this moment. Crossing my fingers I don't fall into the trap again. Wish me luck!
I completely get it bro. It's definitely a tough undertaking that requires complete dedication each and every day, not just when times get tough. Also, for me it's not a challenge, it's a complete lifestyle change. Don't beat yourself up about slipping or relapse. Dust yourself off and get right back at it. Wishing you the best!
Thank you. I have finally completed my Day 1, and I am hoping to move forward with the same pace and motivation.
Yes, it's been two days already. I'm pushing myself harder this time. The only thing is, my mind is oscillating a lot now. I hope I can stop it from wandering.
I totally understand the feeling. Consider channeling that energy for something else recovery related. Read recovery literature, update/start a log on NoFap...add an entry morning and night...and everytime your brain wants to wander. Chat with others in the community via direct message. Incorporate prayer/meditation in to your life each day - could potentially quiet your brain. This is a tough addiction to kick, but it definitely is possible. Stay on top of your recovery and don't be lazy with the recovery tools. This addiction can sneak up anytime, so be vigilant and prepared.
Could you please suggest some recovery literature for me? I'm unsure which one would be the best choice to start with. It has been a week since I joined NoFap. I've tried to reset three or four times in the past few days, but I couldn't control my mind and body. It starts to shiver after a day of resetting, and my mind immediately seeks some dopamine action. I really want to get rid of this bad habit. Never did I think I could reach this level of addiction. I am a social drinker; I don't smoke, and I am still a virgin, saving it for my future wife. Everything is going perfectly as it should be, yet I can't shake off this one bad thing in my life. Due to this, my professional and personal life is getting affected. Additionally, please don't forget to suggest some recovery literature that might help me on this journey. I would like to know how to start a log on NoFap and also how to direct message people in this community. I would really appreciate it if you could help me understand this website. Also please don't forget to suggest me some recovery literature If you have read one. Thank you.
Hey bud. You're definitely in the right place. Also, being willing to take suggestions is a big deal...a lot of people think or say they have this thing figured out, or they don't need help. I commend you brother. Go to the section of the site called 'Reboot Logs' and find your age group. Start a post there...and to it each and every day. Just reply to your own post with updates. Doing this one or more times a day is a great way to develop healthy habits. In addition, it is a place you can be honest and transparent about your struggles and successes. As for private messaging, click the logo of the member, then click "start a conversation.' You can start a private thread with the member that way. I honestly read a ton of 12 step literature from Alcoholics Anonymous. I'm also a member of that program (18 years) and find the literature to not only be a framework for living, but applicable to my sexual addiction. However, I will find some other literature (non AA) that I've read. Just give me some time, I have to take care of my kids right now.
Thank you very much for taking the time to guide me. I truly appreciate it. I will follow your advice and start a log in the Reboot logs section today. Take your time in suggesting the literature to me; I can wait for that. I’m really happy to have someone to help me in this situation. Thank you once again.
