hello, this thought has been on loop in my head and i want to maybe have a conversation with you... if you're a woman, feel free to disagree with the limited view i have of the world, this is valuable as well CONTEXT: last year i was heartbroken twice. 1 relationship that didn't expand into being "couple". 1 other friendship with a long time friend where we found ourselves in an awkward position certainly because i couldn't hold my boundaries... after the first heartbreak (that led me to this forum by the way) i went to a great psychologist and he mentioned something that struck with me. it was in the lines of (with a bit of psychanalysis): -"for a woman there might be attraction but then when the relationship doesn't bloom (into a love/sexual bond) she naturally settles for a friendship" this isn't a light statement and has a lot of effects... PROBLEM: the point is, there are so many great girls out there... i've ruined too many friendships for not embracing being friends with a girl (more than the aforementioned ones). obviously i am sexually attracted to them! BUT! MAYBE! maybe the things i like about these women -that makes me want to be around them- are worth it... QUESTIONS: 1a is there a way for a "boy like me" to move from "sexual attraction" to "friendship"? (like there is a way girls TEND TO resolve into friendships) 1b what should i do/focus on? 2 are there lies that i might be telling myself i should pay attention to that i'm not aware of? (it must be possible i know very nice guys. 2 friends of mine who are successful in their friendhips with girls. one is single, the other with his girlfriend) thank you!
Hey man, you're taking it too hard. If you want to have sex and a relationship with a woman you like physically, just ask her out for a drink. If you're just feeling fun, like you could talk to your friends but you feel no attraction, be friends with her. But don't confuse the two. There are your friends and your relationships with women
