Alot of maladaptive behaviours in our society can likely be traced to fatherlessness. I am curious to see if there is a correlation to porn use among NoFap users.
It's tough to determine the relationship I had. He was most concerned about religion. As a kid, he'd ask me to do something, but I didn't always do it right away, so he'd do it. I didn't feel involved in his work. I remember him coming to my room to talk to me, but I would always shut down. I never felt emotionally close to him. I didn't feel that he really cared about me - it must be that way, idk. I don't know why I shut down, and I think whenever he talked to me, it was only about religion or something else, idk really, it was always a lecture type, nothing positive. I suspect that as a kid, I didn't feel seen. Occasionally he'd organize a trip or something, but it wasn't often. Idk. Somehow the connection didn't form. Our community isn't really about personal growth, more about religion, so that had something big to play in it. I also think his dad probably didn't connect with him well.
I chose the first option because I know my dad cared and valued me, he just had a lot of trauma due to his upbringing, war, etc. He died some 12 years ago, and I miss him every day.
I'm sorry for your loss. That must be very hard I think I am a mix of #1 and #2, knowing I was cared for, but at the same time not being engaged really for much of my childhood. @SilentWolfSong I can see similarities with my dad. Interactions leaned towards lecturing and doing things 'properly'. Nothing really about enjoying things together. I see that his dad likely did not give him proper attention either. Guess it is up to us to break the cycle for our kids