I started watcing p when i was 12-13.I was watching totally normal stuff vanilla,etc.Then i found myself watching rape force videos which man forces girl to sex.Then i started to watch lesbian p which is one of them dominant.Yeah in the end i faced with femdom.I was just laughing how those man can do that kind of things but now i am in that dark road.When i was 6-7 years I had a male cousine who is older than me.He told me we gonna play a game and i found my self touching his dick.I loved being dominated by him somehow.That shit went like that for 3 years maybe but when i was 10-11 i suddenly realised wtf am i doing and i give up.He was calling me but i never went again and never had urges to go.I am dominant person in real life.I remember since my childhood i never been a poor guy or nerd etc.Girls was wanting me but i didint have a girlfriend in middle school.When i was in highscool i was watching normal porn sometimes force rape but i wasnt addicted to it.Once in a week maybe.I was a dominant person so i had a fight with 3 guys and got kicked from highscool and went to other one.I was getting bullied but not in a certain way.They were my brothers friends so i wasnt giving a fuck.Then i became a part of them but i feel like i lost my some parts to become one of them.In these times my fendom fetish started.Im now 20 and have a girlfriend.I was virgin when i addicted to it.I really love to have sex with my girlfriend but we live in other homes so we cant have sex every day.Thats when fendom stuff hunts me.I am looking for suggestions guys i really want to get rid of this shit my english is not that good sorry but i tried to explain , thanks for answers
Hey man, sorry to hear about what happened with your older cousin when you were younger. I personally don’t have experience with the femdom stuff, but I can relate to getting off to extreme things in porn that lead me feeling ashamed and disgusted with myself. First things first, understand that you have a problem with porn, and you want to quit. Whenever you get these femdom urges, associate them with the porn addiction in which you are trying to quit. I can assure you, with enough time away from PMO, your brain will undo anything porn might have conditioned into your brain, if the tastes for femdom was something related to porn addiction, you will notice it go away when you get rid of your addiction to porn. Lastly, have you ever talked to anyone about what happened with your older cousin? I can understand it might make you feel ashamed, but I think it would be a good idea for you to speak about someone you trust about this matter as it may have a seriously negative impact on you down the line if it’s not addressed and put to rest.
I did not talk about anyone beacuse it is like russian roulette to talk this to anyone even to threapists cuz its my life secret.I will try to find a online threapist in the future. thanks for your answer mate.
Many people did “gay” things with friends or cousins when young. I remember playing swords with friends when I was young. Watching porn in a group and everybody jacking of and things like that You played with an older cousin and it was a little different. Maybe it cause a little trauma but many people have different traumas. It’s just life. I met many girls that their cousins touched them when they were young. Shit happens. I don’t believe that is what got you into femdom. When we have this addiction of porn we try to understand why this is happening. Everybody has different stories but the rabbit hole of porn abuse is almost identical in everybody. We all have small traumas because of things that happen in our life. Stop watching porn and get rid of this addiction.
Thank you for answer man.Yeah i dont think so too cuz i was never into that stuff women dominate me i always laughed how those people can do that etc.When i became porn addict the rabbit hole took me down more and more so here i am.
I didint have urges into femdom for 3 days.I am hanging out with my gf and having good time and sex.I need to be aware in stresfull situations i think that where it hunts you.
The best thing to do is love ourselves if we struggling with femdom.This a vicious cycle.When we watch we hate ourselves but this fetish hunts you when you hate yourself. Stop hating.Just embrace your selves and keep going.Do things which you going to be proud of.
I wrote a very lot of stuff in my journal about this. Pse check that out. For now I've no time to repeat what already is in my journal.
I went through somthing similiar to this, know this is not who you are. The addiction will play tricks on your mind. We are al naturually heterosexual down to our dna
