After 2 months of hard mode, I relapsed today and it wasn't even the porn cravings that triggered it (strong as they were) but the dreaded "groinal response" (a purely physical sensation, no thoughts or cravings, even though I have HOCD). I masturbated to relieve the pressure down there caused by the groinals because I was sleepy as hell and needed some rest. It was when I woke up the next morning that I started getting porn cravings. One thing lead to another and I automatically (in fact, compulsively) started looking up videos on YouTube But it's weird, really. In the videos I really cared for nothing except the females, despite getting groinals to guys all day long. I barely noticed the guys in the videos (well, I noticed them, but I was hell bent on the women like I normally am) so if anything the dudes were a distraction (that's how horny I was, yes, even the OCD wasn't loud enough to distract me). In fact, this is something I've noticed about the groinal response since it started; it may not be a sexual response proper, but it leads to (normal) sexual thoughts and feelings as soon as the OCD trigger is gone (you obsess about one thing, and two minutes later you crave an altogether different thing!). I'm not going back to the old ways, and will reset my counter and pick myself up, but I'm really starting to wonder whether this is porn-induced HOCD or simply HOCD. Has anyone here been through the same and if they have did rebooting really help?
I don't have a lot of experience with feelings of HOCD, but have talked, helped, and read studies about it. I can clarify more if you want. But can relate to you on the groinal response. I a lot of times have to consciously keep my hands of my dick. I can reading a boring article about something, really whatever and I will kind my hand will gravitate to my groin and it can get hard from that, and it also is a dopamine response. Since watching porn and masturbating, I think I subconsciously do that so I will give up what I am doing and watch porn. And the next morning you experienced the chaser effect. You have to be really conscious about what you are physically doing, once your dopamine starts flooding into brain to watch porn, masturbate, or both, hard to turn that off. I would go for a walk, take a cold shower, something to take your mind off it.
