I'm not sure if this is the right place to post this, so feel free to move, admins. My question applies to dating but it also applies to any other interactions between men and women - platonic friendship, professional relations etc.. I'm really curious how your interactions with women in real life correlate with your desire to watch porn and/or masturbate in general (even without any visual stimuli). My assumption would be that the perceived urge would increase as you see attractive women but can't interact with them sexually so you need a substitute: PMO. However, what I've observed in myself, is often the complete opposite. In the last few years I've often fapped daily or at least every other day out of habit and even if I tried to take a break I struggled to make it last more than a few days because of strong urges. This seemed to be completely unrelated to the count and perceived attractiveness and/or availability of women I interacted with in my daily life. However, interestingly, my two longest abstinence streaks this year happened in these situations: - I went on a date with a woman who had strong interest in me but I wasn't very attracted to her. There was no sex but some cuddling on the first day. After that I felt no need to fap for a few days. - I spent three whole days very closely with a woman where dating her was something I ruled out as she was only in the country for a few days before returning to a very distant country. This woman, however, is the literal definition for what I think of as female beauty and attractiveness. Obviously there was no space for fapping during that time but even a few days afterwards there was no urge and no sexual thoughts whatsoever. While I do have some theories about why I felt like this, I'd like to hear if anyone experienced something similar before sharing more of my thoughts.
I am of a strong belief that mutual romantic interaction with a woman who you TRULY like eliminates the desire for PMO On multiple occasions, including my record 94 day streak about a year ago, when I hung out with a girl who actually liked me, and I liked her, and there was touching, cuddling, even with or without sex… I wouldn’t want to PMO because I thought it was so much better interacting with the girl and I didn’t want to mess it up So yea, I agree with your experiences. But for me, it has to be a mutual sexual and romantic attraction to eliminate PMO desire. The girl can’t just be a friend or coworker, has to be romantic in nature
For myself personally I have found that if I am dating a woman, I have no desire to watch porn. Something in my brain just clicks and there is no desire to watch porn. It is usually this way after one date or even the possibly of dating a woman. For example, a friend of mine was trying to fix me up with someone over the summer, we started texting and while she was on vacation for the summer (she is a teacher) and away, we figured this would be a good way to start getting to know each other. Although nothing ever came of it, during that time we were texting I was not watching porn. I think the reason I don't watch porn is that I somehow feel it is disrespectful to the woman to watch porn and like the previous post said, real interaction with a woman is way better then anything porn can provide. The big thing for me that I learned is that in any relationship, platonic, professional, romantic, if the woman is doing something that triggers you, it is your problem and not hers, and you need to find a way to deal with it.
