Played through an old PS2 game called Area 51, FPS released in 2005. The controls are good, the levels are good - but it feels a bit gimmicky and short. Could have been on-par with Half Life had it been less arcadey and more serious.
Rangers won 2-0 against Heart of Midlothian at Hampden today in the Scottish Cup Semi-Final. Surprised we managed to get a tune out this team. Other than that, I have done nothing the whole day. I feel lazy but my adhd is making it hard to focus.
He Bingles, sorry to hear about the rough patch. I had a similar one recently. Think of what you would tell a good friend who was struggling and then say that to yourself. Keep your head up!
Cheers Ghost. I'm trying my best. It's so hard, honestly I feel like giving into the urges sometimes but it only makes the situation worse. Men; women - whatever gives me my fix of dopamine for that day, that moment, I'll take it. Makes me feel like a filthy degenerate. I know I'm not, I am just lost and confused.
I'm in too deep above my head on things that are beyond my comprehension. It's like a never-ending struggle, a useless battle against something so beyond yourself. Turn to medications, video games, junk food, God. Man, you end up feeling worse since you know you can do better. You know if you just did this different, or just had this and this that it would all go away.
It’s rough but I think our outlook of wanting temptations/urges to never happen is another part of our issue with fantasy. There isn’t going to be such a time, so when we war against that reality we make dealing with it more difficult. If we accept life as it is, then that can sometimes make carrying its burdens less stressful.
Luke Smith made a great video on how fantasising is demonic. Fyodor Dostoyevsky wrote in one of his short stories of a man so obsessed with talking to himself that he would get angry when real people would interrupt. Fantasy is evil, we can't let it control us. It is not real. It is the bastardization of imagination - the Gift which God gave us.
Life will always be rubbish because we make it rubbish. Truth is, we WANT suffering. God knows we're sadistic, cruel little shits because he created us and knows our struggles. All we can do is reject our sinful ways as much as we could and pray to God for our salvation.
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